Today, I would like to bring to light something that infuriates me. The following Sure deodorant advertisement significantly reduces my faith in humanity.

What the hell has the world come to for a large company to expect people to respond to this shit?

First, and certainly the lesser offender on this ad, there is absolutely no creativity in it whatsoever. This is close to the dullest ad I’ve ever seen on the webs. I think the only things that would make this worse are flashing and sound, but at least in those cases it catches the customer’s eye. My cat has drawn more interesting things in MS Paint by accident. “Hey guys I’ve invented two new colors: ‘blah’ and ‘light blah’! We can use them in a gradient in our new advertisement. And I’m working on another color we can use for the button part of the ad that does absolutely nothing. I’m calling it ‘meh’.”

Second, and by far the worse of the two, is the slogan. This makes me want to type profanities in capital letters until my fingers bleed. This is a family-safe site, however, so I won’t be doing that. This is absolutely atrocious. No capitalization, no punctuation, and only half the words aren’t spelled like a 13 year-old girl sending a text message to her ‘BFF’. The slogan itself doesn’t even make sense for a deodorant company! Seriously, Sure should have enough money to pay someone with an IQ greater than 80 to write their ads.

I think someone’s retarded cousin needs to be fired. Affirmative action be damned.